Now I know

Now I know why.

It just hit me why I blog. Why I enjoy the whole concept of blogging.

It isent about documenting my life. It isent about venting my frustrations.

It's really about writing about things I want to tell people. Letting my friends or the people around me know how I feel and about the interesting things that happened in my life.

Thus, it puzzles me from time to time when people say they want their blog to be a 'secret' in which only a few people should know...

I mean, i know how they feel. That they want their innermost thoughts to be only amongst their closest friends. But I somehow believe that deep deep down inside, those things that they write in their blog, they wanna really scream it out to the whole world and just really let loose. And they dont want it to be confined to just close friends.

To let the world know, Hey! Here I come and THIS is what I am, like it or not.

I mean, if it was really that secret, you wouldnt really write it out on the web where people could just basically search your name and chance upon your blog right? And if it was really confined to closest friends, surely these close friends would talk to you on the phone instead of reading last week's news on your life at look-what-I-did-and-how-I-felt-last-week.blogspot.com right?

Or maybe its jsut a nice way to make your friends feel special. " Psht, this is my blog addy, keep it secret ok? I only tell you cause you're my best friend :-) "

But it definitely isent my place to judge. Correct me if I'm wrong of course, but thats just my 2 pence worth of thought. Yeah, its two pence, twice that price of the normal penny.

And to my buds out there whom I know their blogs and have been asked to keep it secret, I'm not dissing you guys alright?

Its just really my opinion, and surely I'm entitled to that right? :-) haha, I would rather speak out the truth about how I felt, then be a hypocrite and say, "hey! That's what I feel too."

But feeling this way doesnt mean I would leak out your secret... Especially... Hahahaha, you know who you are... Only the brotherhood shall know. WA HA HA HA

Hmm.. or maybe knowing a secret blog is fun cause, it drives those, who doesnt know it and wants to, crazy!

WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHahahahahhahahahahahahahaha

Nightmares

I cant remember when was the last time I had a nightmare. But it just struck yesterday.

I think it had something to do with me having a fever and falling sick. So being sick, which was extremely sudden and annoyingly after I said to a couple of people I wouldnt fall sick so easily.

So anyway, I went back camp early to try to sleep, and I couldnt, cause my whole body was aching ( due to fever I belive ) and waking up every 40mins just makes you all the more tired. And to top it all off, I had to get a nightmare.

So lemmi tell u guys about my nightmare. I think I had it before cause it seems kinda familiar. I was in a dark room and talking to a witch, with a bottle in my hand. The bottle contained a fetus, which apparently belonged to me.

I know. It couldn't be right? I mean, I'm a guy! How can it belong to me?? Unless I brought it from a shop or a women, which makes no sense, cause.. well... what can u do with a fetus?

You obviously cant kick it around or shoot hoops with it. Well, maybe you can, but that would be kinda insensitive. And the goo and slim probably doesnt help.

So yeah, anyway I wanted to get rid of it cause the spirit of the fetus is AFTER me! Which once again, in the light of day makes no sense. I mean, why would it wanna get me? For no reason? Maybe its pissed cause I use it to play basketball.

Yeah, anyway in all seriousness, it wanted to get me lar! I dont know how, and I dont know why. So I was asking the witch to help me. So the witch was telling me the conditions and the price and everything when I woke up.

Yeah, its scary. Cause when I woke up, my camp had a power short circuit or something cause all the corridor lights and toilet lights were off and couldnt be turned on.

And I had to go toilet urgently, despite the fact I had body aches all over.

Cause. I needed. To blow my nose.

And thats the end of my late night adventure! I went to toilet blew my nose, and went back to my 40min sleep cycles.

Thanks for tuning in! :-) And please. No kicking of fetuses.

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I just love getting to know new people. Especially new people who are nice and interesting. I really enjoy getting to know what a person is like, how he/she talks, what she/he wants to be when they grow up. I especially like to talk to young people, e.g my age or younger because they're so full of dreams and goals and promise!

And I honestly dont feel my age sometimes. Though I've 21, I've got a ton of friends which are younger, in fact some as young as 16? And i realise this though. That age isent a factor at all when it comes to maturity.

But I guess we all knew that.

And i wanna talk about two people which I got to know a lil better recently. Shi Jie and Yan Bing.

These two characters are super funny lar! They are one of the most joyous people I know in my life! And maybe its jsut cause I dont know them well enough to know their struggle, but being with them really makes me laugh and smile.

Shi Jie ( With Straight Face ) , " I wanna thank god for saving my life. "

Yan Bin ( cheekily looks at Tien Tien as she speaks )

Knowing new people just breathes life into a mundane existence.

Though I do miss some old ones.
You know who you guys are.
Just two, can it be any simpler?
Talking once every 2 or 3 weeks,
Just doesnt really cut it.

Hairy Situations

Ok, I realise this.

Girls, like hair.

I mean, they REALLY like hair! Its like, a prerequisite to their friendship and admiration! Want chicks? Grow hair I say!

Hahaha, know why?
Well... you see, recently, I've been trying to help promote a friend of mine and how it started is a long story, which I might tell if I have the time one day...

So anyway, I realise that girls always say the same things about my friend!

1. He's a bit on the fat side ( but thats still ok )
2. He's really quiet and girls prefer funny fat guys to a good-looking quiet one ( which I choose to differ)
3. He's balding. ( of which i have no defence )

And almost all girls would say this other guy, lets call him K, cute.

The difference? A crop of lionmane hair surrounding his head.

I mean. COME ON! If hair's that important, then get a gorilla for crying out loud!

So yeah. * Grins * I just find this extremely interesting and amusing, haha

Someone different

You know something? These past few days, I realized something.

That feeling you get in your heart... that you're doing the right thing? But yet, you always feel so reluctant, so unwilling to do it?

Do it.

Well, I dont know if any of you guys feel what I feel. I know that somethings in life, are the " right and good " things. You know... like helping old people across the streets.

But what if its raining? And you dont have an umbrella. You're feeling wet and horrible, lonely and tired. There are LOTS of others around with umbrellas and raincoats to boot. So now, are you still gonna sacrifice? Or let someone else do it?

I volunteered to help out JAMS church today... Well, basically i volunteered cause there's no one else, and.. yeah, there's no one else.

For those who do not know, JAMS means Jesus for All MindS. Its a ministry to the intellectualy disabled! And trust me. Ushers, you have my respect, choir you sing really well.

But to truely LOVE a person, without ANY benefit to yourself, without any judgement,without anger or repulsion. Imagine when you get hit or your hair's pulled, you cant get angry... And when you are in JAMS ministry, its really because, well... you gotta have a beautiful heart...

JAMS guys. You have my utter respect.

The first thing this guy ( Yi Chuan )said to us was... When you see them, smile! And not just smile, but smile where they can see your TEETH and look really happy to see them!

Ha! Easy I thought, megawatt charming smile CHRIS style coming right up.

Dont get me wrong, I was nervous I would judge them as well... I even prayed before I started to go out... And I imagined everything will be OK and I would be comfortable about it all.

But imagination is really ONE thing. And life is really another..

I just felt lost! Here they were coming in, and was I supposed to invite them, to usher them in, to smile, to talk to them? What!? I had no idea what to do...

So in the end, I just tried to shake their hands and asked whats their name and have they eaten... Seeing them smile, hearing them call me teacher... Even now, as i type this, I'm smiling to myself at the memory... After that, smiling and grinning just came natural...

And they are so well behanved, or most of them at least, when you say something, they'll really listen to you... and when you're stacking up the chairs, all of them will wanna help you!

Can u imagine those normal people doing that? Everyone just rushes off to do their own stuff! These kids really show you a new perspective of life. Their own simple perspective.
And they dont deserve the stares they get in public, or the looks of disgust from old aunties who wouldnt ever know what it means.


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To my non-christian friends, this might really sound corny and all, but, I'm still gonna say it. God Is Good!

He is so so good! As I stood there, and looked around, watching them praise God, and worship him. The Spirit just overwhelmed me la... And I knew, that no matter who you are, what you look like, how you speak.

God simply just loves you...

And standing there, look at the parents with their children. Wondering about all the things they went through. Looking at how the JAMS ministry people serve and treat these guys like normal people, hearing them sing and jump and smile... It's a really touching moment.

And I know now, beyond all doubt that our God is a Awesome God! And at this point I remembered CCC's song I heard at FOP

Our God is an awesome God.
He reigns from heaven above
With wisdom, power and love
Our God is an awesome God!!!

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Next time you see a someone different. What would you do? What would you think?

Would you be lost? Would you be disgusted? Would you judge? Or would you pity?

I dont claim to be an expert after just one session.
But I do know this though...

The best thing you probably could do.
Is show your teeth.

:-)

One soft touch

Alright, it was raining. Bad.

The rain of one day was equal to 25% of ALL the rain that fell in 2006.

So I was on my sofa, watching Dawn of the dead. I've been on that couch for the past 6 hours, watching movies and basically slacking around.

I had dinner at six thirty which I had already promise to go. But boy did I feel lazy. None of W171 was free to go. No new friends were going. And quite a few E345 people couldnt make it as well cause they were sick.

And as I laid there, I thought to myself. What's the point of me going? Though I've already promised. The people that I liked talking to in E345 were not going anyway. Only those I dont really talk to much.

It was gonna be boring! Or so I thought.

But I realise though, that God's like that! It isent always about being with the most fun people. It isent always about going out with those people u like and can talk with. It isent about me, myself, I and how much fun I can have!

So anyway, I dragged myself up. Got dressed, and walked through the rain ( soaking wet ) to the bus stop and then down town.

It felt rotton walking through the rain to a place you werent really excited about going. Oh, and did i mention that in the end, we went to a restaurant whoes food I did not like to eat that much?

Deary deary deary... Boring boring boring....

So dinner was ok... had a bit of jokes, discussed some stuff... Nothing like those wild crazy LAUGH LIKE YOU'RE MAD AND YOU DONT CARE WHAT PEOPLE THINK dinners.

But still nice.

And after that we walked around cine for a while.

Ok. At this point, this point is where it ALL turns around.

We went into a quiet corner, and celebrated Wei ming's birthday!

And you know something? This is what it's all about! As we sang him the song, I could tell how touched he was, how speechless he looked. I dont know much about him, but I do know he's really quiet, and I know he's been through alot.

And as we sang the song for him, he just teared up...

And his mom said this " ever since he came into this group, he's been happier. He's starting to speak out more, and his life has changed so much... "

And This. Is what makes every single thing worthwhile. This is what God and church and cell group's about!

Singing and jumping and praising are great! But making a difference in a person's life... I belive that's what God really wants us to do isent it?

Loving God wholeheartedly. Loving People Fervently.

One soft touch.

I remember once again, what I'm here for.

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